Yo no quiero agua! Yo quiero bebida!!!

I’m not a man who loves to admit mistakes but if there is one I thought I had committed on this trip it’s that I didn’t plan much of anything out… at all. I had a place to stay that I had no Idea the condition of, all of us arrived at different times spread over 2 days and food wasn’t even a thought, which is rare for me. So, with that said, I’m actually incredibly surprised with the quality of food we’ve been having. We didn’t have any restaurants we wanted to try ahead of time or anything like that we just ran around and the result was not at all disappointing. When the whole group arrived we agreed on a restaurant in old San Juan called Raises, like many an arrival on our part, we had no idea what to expect.

IMG_0918 IMG_0919

That’s mofongo relleno de churrasco and the chuleta kan kan. The english translations of which are “plantain stuffed with steak” and “super giant pork chop,” the names were very fitting.

The next order of business was provisioning for our weekend in the mountains, so off to the shops we were. As you have to remember there were 6 people staying in one house for about 4 days so it was imperative that we not skimp on the necessities.

IMG_0922 IMG_0921

Our obsession with tiny beers would continue throughout our stay here but it makes perfect sense. Although this is not my first run in with tiny beers the logic behind them is sound. Being in a tropical location a smaller beer will be consumed at a quicker pace, keeping them cool during the duration of the experience. The only problem I had with this packaging option is that they still came in 6 packs, if you’re going to be selling me bottles that hold less liquid it seems only natural that you include more bottles to offset the loss, but I digress.

The first night was insane, we were so happy that the house was as amazing at as it was, perched mountainside overlooking the beach, we threw back a few and got a good nights rest in preparation for the next day’s exploits. When I awoke (on the couch in the living room and not the bed I had claimed) Megan was cooking up fried ham and cheese sammiches for the bunch. I happily accepted.

IMG_0923  IMG_9657

I also stuffed my face with doritos. That night we ventured out, Brandon and I’s usual tactic of hopping on the interwebs or pulling out our phones and booting yelp weren’t doing much good out in Yabucoa so we did as those before us did and just moved in one direction, hoping to find something decent to eat. Much to the dismay of some of our party members we happened on a local eatery that had “seafood and steak” in the title, that appeased most appetites so we stopped there. I ordered a drink at the bar on our way in then we sat down. Then the bartender walked up and gave us some menus. Shortly after, she came back and asked what we would like to eat. “I want the shrimp cocktail” said Michelle, to which our bartender/server/manager and now cook replied “no you don’t”. So Michelle asked what she did want, and the reply was “conch, I’ve got them alive back there, I kill them and make them up fresh” so conch it was. I ordered a steak and was quickly shot down “no steak,” so I had the snapper, but I have to admit that when the name of your establishment includes “seafood and steak” you should probably put slightly more effort into keeping some steak around. The fresh seafood was way beyond what I expected, seriously well seasoned and savory. Unfortunately we didn’t snap any shots of this stuff but we did get this one picture in the parking lot in front of where we put the car.

IMG_0925 For anyone who doesn’t read Spanish, that says “no horses here” which is apparently a congestion issue in these parts of the island, there was a 4 horse pile up on our way in that cost us at least 30 min.

The next night Rafa brought over some fish he had recently caught and fried them up for us.

IMG_9676 IMG_9671

Some of the girls also got partial to the fresh coconut that Brandon was so keen on getting along the shore the day before.

On the way out for half the group we headed back to old San Juan and had lunch with my Tia Mari and Rafa, we tried our best to thank them for the opportunity to visit this breathtaking place but I feel like some words and a meal just didn’t cut it. Either way the restaurant they chose was beyond any of our expectations.

IMG_2818  IMG_2820

That’s a home made hot sauce that did a better than average job of clearing the sinuses of people who had been beaten by waves for the past few days and a rice dish prepared in a pineapple that Keara had.

IMG_2819 IMG_2821

That’s my Tia Mari (Seriously, can’t thank her enough) and I, followed by what I had at that meal, filet mignon stuffed with a ground chicken and pork deliciousness that should be illegal. You may also notice the home made “tomatoed oil” in the background which went very nicely on the rice.

The last night (or so we thought) it was half the crew and we settled for leftovers, then had a rousing game of Clue.

IMG_2826 IMG_2830

I’m sure we ate more serious meals but the Dewars is weighing heavy on me at the moment and I’m realizing I’ve been typing for way too long so that’s it.

-Drops mic.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: